March 7th, 2019

How to Deal with The Trauma of Divorce and Survive in Your Society and Culture

Coping with divorce is a very difficult task? The truth is that it is difficult for most people to deal with this stress. However, giving up and losing yourself is not the solution. What you need to keep in mind is that sometimes relationships fail to work despite your efforts. It does not mean that you should blame yourself for the situation.

What you should remember is that there are many like you who are in a similar dilemma. Now, the question is how you should deal with such a situation in the first place.

How to Emotionally Cope with A Divorce

When a person faces a divorce situation, then he or she goes through unsettling and uncomfortable feelings. For example, you may go through phases of fear and anxiety. There are times when you may go through a killing phase of loneliness. It is important to remember that all these are natural feelings, and they will eventually go away.

If you are angry about the stubborn behavior of your partner, then it is also a natural thing. There are times when you will get upset about your perceived failure. However, what you need to remember is that dwelling over the problem will not help at all.

The more you ponder over the issue, the more difficult it will become to come out of it. The first step is that you should not hold your emotions inside you. If you feel like grieving over the problem, then do not stop yourself.

You will only be able to move forward in life when you are over with the period of grief. Remember that grieving is the first step towards overcoming the problem. What you need to know is that grief can be immobilizing at times, but it is not the end of the world for sure.

It is human psyche that slowly and gradually you will be able to move forward in life. However, you should not be hasty. Give yourself sometime when you are about to proceed towards the legal divorce process.

It is important to bring your life back in order before moving towards the divorce proceeding.

Prioritize tasks to cope up with emotional pressure

When you are separated from your partner, then you have to manage everything on your own. For example, you will have to pay the bills and meet all the deadlines. You do not want to add more stress to your life at this point. The solution is simple. You should try to prioritize your tasks.

When you define the priorities of the tasks, then you will not face a lot of stress. You will be able to manage things despite the tough phase.

Talk it out

The worst thing most people do is that when they are in a divorce situation, they do not discuss things with their loved ones. It is essential that you vent out your emotions to buy your peace of mind.

When you discuss your problems with your loved ones, you will feel better. Plus, your loved ones will suggest ways through which you can overcome the stress bothering you. If you feel that you are unable to trust your friends and family, then it will not be a bad idea to join support groups. People facing a similar situation may be able to offer you the necessary help in this situation and help in your emotional recovery.

Moving Towards the Legal Proceedings

At times it can be painful to deal with the legal proceedings of divorce. Well, in that case, it is essential that you should get emotionally prepared to deal with this situation. There are times when both the partners are ready to opt for a settlement outside the court. It is the best approach. However, things are never that easy all the time.

It is possible that the settlement may not take place and you may have to go the court. In this situation, you need to gather all the courage so that you can face this situation. The truth is that when you are about to step into the court for a divorce, then you need to think smart rather than grieve over the problem.

Ascertain whether you need a divorce attorney. If yes, then you need to define your line of action. Before, hiring an attorney, see if you can get hold of a reliable mediator. The mediator can help both the spouses in reaching a sensible agreement. If things do not work out, then you can start searching for a divorce attorney.

If you are in Los Angeles, then you can get hold of the best Los Angeles Divorce Attorney provided you conduct your research the smart way.

Hiring a divorce attorney

Conduct online research to find the top divorce attorneys. You can also ask your friends and family for recommendations. What you should keep in mind that you should not go for immediate hire. Scheduling a consultation session with the attorney is essential.

When you consult the attorney for the first time, you will get a fair idea whether you have a comfort zone with the attorney or not. If you are not comfortable, then this means that you are walking in the wrong direction.

Ideally, the attorney should be ready to give you an honest opinion about what is coming your way at your first meeting. He should let you know all the factual details. A reliable attorney will never keep you in the dark.

The best approach is to go for a certified attorney. If the lawyer has the necessary certification, then this means that he is an expert in his field, and has all the necessary experience.

Before choosing the attorney, you should look at the official website of the divorce attorney also so that you can get the details about the services. Most of the sites have live support too so that your questions can get addressed in time.

Now once you select your divorce lawyer, it is also essential that you should have a clear idea about what you should discuss with your lawyer.

Things to discuss with your divorce attorney

Property Matters

One of the essential things that you need to discuss with the attorney is the property that you acquired with your spouse during your marriage. For example, it can include your house. Plus, it can also include some additional things that you bought during your marriage. For example, you may have bought jewelry or furniture together.

Your lawyer will be able to clear many ambiguities in this regard. If your spouse bought any property under his or her name, then he will likely remain the owner of the property. However, if you bought the property together as a couple, and both the names appear on the title, then you do own one-half interest over the property.

 Such assets are eligible for a division. When you visit your attorney, you should take the property list along with you. The list should also include the title names. When your lawyer has the details of your property, then he will be in a position to guide you in a better way.

Talk About the Alimony

Alimony is yet another matter which most couples are eager to discuss. What you need to keep in mind is depending upon the state the alimony laws may vary. Your attorney will be able to give you a detailed insight into the alimony laws of Los Angeles.

When you visit your attorney, then he will guide you about different factors that affect the alimony amount. The length of the marriage, the age of the couple and education of the couple are some of the factors that may play a crucial role to determine the alimony amount.

 You may talk about rehabilitative alimony with your lawyer. The main objective of this type of alimony is to make the disadvantaged spouse financially independent. If the marriage lasted for a long time, then you may discuss permanent alimony with your lawyer.

The important aspect is that you should be upfront with your lawyer so that he can give you the needed guidance when it comes to the alimony.

Your divorce lawyer will guide you about the best line of action. However, it is advisable that you should not conceal any facts from your lawyer. If you want your divorce proceedings to go in your favor, then you need to confide in your lawyer so that he can help you out in the best possible way.

You can talk about some of your career goals as well with your lawyer so that he can ascertain how long it will take you to become financially independent.

The truth is that divorce is a painful situation. However, when you get stuck in such a situation, then you need to think with a practical point of view. Follow the guidance of your lawyer to the core so that you can avoid more trouble coming your way.

Jamshaid Chaudhary

I began writing as a professional on my personal blog and then discovered my true calling, which is writing about technology, News and gadgets in general. I am a technical writer, author, and blogger since 2010. An industry watcher that stays on top of the latest features, extremely passionate about juicy tech news and everything related to gadgets. For tech tips,