March 13th, 2019

Important Steps for Fathers Fighting a Restraining Order During Divorce or Separation

Fathers’ legal rights during separation and divorce are usually overlooked. And if you’re a father dealing with a restraining order as part of a guardianship fight with your ex-lover, you have to make sure you take several important steps as early as you find out any bogus order has been given against you. This post has been authored in the particular hope that it may help to take care of the situation – along with the advantageous outcome being to suit your needs, not her.

Step # 1: Move Documents Information and Records Out of Her Reach to Any Safe Area.

This is actually a very important step and really should be performed as quickly as possible – yes, in the middle of the night if necessary. If you are dealing with any restraining order, you’re certainly prohibited from visiting her house to sort this issue out. However, you have to get those documents out of the home.

For that reason, it’s completely sensible and within your father’s separation and divorce legal rights to ask a relative or friend to get these documents for you. Without having anyone to request, or they are not close enough to get it done over time, ask the Restraining Order Lawyer to arrange this for you.

You should buy computer discs or even hard disk drives which hold related information and facts about them – if you feel your ex-lover may cause problems in this regard, confer with your legal professional regarding getting the entire computer seized by an impartial 3rd party. This is the best move in case you have shared information on your discs (so she cannot claim you’ve sabotaged her data by any means).

An example of this type of documents that needs to be taken from her reach is job information, salary details, the will, taxes or sales data.

Step # 2: Do Not Sign Any Document.

Under no circumstances, sign any contract or documents that you have not had the capacity to fully understand while fighting your restraining order or even determining the way to win custody of the children. You ought to get the legal professional to look at any contracts. A standard approach to refuse a father’s separation and legal divorce rights, while she’s planning to win a child custody fight, is to get him to sign contracts which no attorney can easily get removed later down the road.

My own ex-lover offered to withdraw her bogus household assault claim against me (this was halting me seeing my children for several months at that point) in case I would sign any parental custodianship split contract in which I would get to visit my kids every 3rd Sunday of the month. Even though enticed, I did not sign it – as well as 5 years later I have got full and right custody of the children. My legal professional recognized that I would do the right thing by not caving into my ex blackmail in early stages, while I could not manage to pay for an attorney, so I was clueless that if I was doing the right thing.

Step # 3: Lock Up Any Kind Of Jointly-Owned Property for Example Bank Accounts or Credit Cards or Retirement Benefits.

This one can certainly hold back until the morning and should just take a couple of minutes of your time (a really pleasant thing when you are trying to puzzle out the way to fight any restraining order and the way to win your custody of the children!). Let the ex-know you want to do all this via your attorney or even a mutually-acceptable relative or friend.

Firstly, terminate the joint bank cards entirely – do not ask to put a more affordable investing limit on them; it is simply not worth the cost. Lots of money of financial debt can certainly increase on one card within a few minutes, so if you feel the major card holder, it will be you footing your bill. In case the ex is vindictive enough to submit a bogus abuse claim against you, simply to see you dealing with a restraining order, she is underhanded enough to induce your financial trouble in different ways too. In the event that she’s already begun a spending spree, report your credit card as ripped off (you may find yourself paying a few bucks to pay for the issuing bank’s expenses, my very own cost $50 in charges while my ex made a decision to get a new clothing on my penny).

Secondly, get rid of exactly 1 / 2 of all funds kept in joint accounts, and get away from adding to IRAs, 401(K) financial records or any other pension plan held collectively. Decide to pay the 1 / 2 of any outstanding expenses or charges that the bank account owes, for instance by writing your cheque. By doing this, you’re getting exactly what is truly yours but not battling a dirty separation and divorce game the way she plays.

Step # 4: Keep Your Journal

Document important activities that could have an effect on fighting your restraining order, or even winning the custody of the children. Record time invested with the children quarrels with the ex-lover – essentially any information and facts that might have an effect on your divorce or separation proceedings. Ensure that it stays in a secure place, in a steel box.

Make absolutely certain that you follow truthful details (dates, times, those in work, places) since your journal could be subpoenaed as written proof down the road, and used against you by the ex. At least she may want to file the petition to study the contents in case she finds out anything, even if there’s nothing in there that can help her case. One technique I learned about is usually to start journal entry along with “To My Lawyer, [his or her name]” so the record turns into “privileged communication” and is not prone to be subpoenaed.

It should be best if you have a 2nd journal for your personal feelings and thoughts regarding what is going on – this solved the problem profoundly during 3-year child custody battle (where I was also battling a restraining order).

Can A Father Get Child Custody While Fighting a Restraining Order?

I am going to provide you with a few practical ideas that made it easier for me win child custody of my boy while I was dealing with a restraining order so that you can benefit from my practical experience during your own legal battle.

Tip 1: A Costly Legal Professional Is Not Always a Reasonable Defense

When I began fighting a restraining order during the separation and divorce, I appeared to be in the fortunate stance that I just opted for the first available family attorney I possibly could find without needing to be concerned too much regarding the expenses. However even I was surprised while I noticed a few of the bills coming through, since the services I acquired was horrible.

My legal professional didn’t clarify a few extremely important points regarding the way family cases of divorce are addressed by the system with regards to fighting my restraining order simultaneously – and tossing more cash at her or him is not going to provide them with the knowledge the case requires. Try and get someone with a particular understanding of your type of situation, if you opt to seek the services of any legal professional in any way (I actually ended up protecting myself in the final year of a lawsuit).

Tip 2: Keep Second Journal

There’s a chance you’re asking yourself exactly why there is the “two” in this particular tip. I will make clear since it is one of the greatest tips you are going to be provided about the best way to fight your restraining order.

Continue to keep your journal of the particular date ranges, location, time and witness of any event or conversation that may impact the defense. Ensure that it stays informative and to the point. Dealing with any restraining order is not about fighting sneaky, it comes down to actively playing within the policies and being as wise as your ex-lover. In the event that she requests to need upkeep expenses right after filing the particular restraining order, record it, log it, make use of it as proof – she cannot be “in fear of harm” in case she demands on harassing you for more funds, can she?

Tip 3: Never Lose Heart

Your children will simply grow up once, and they’re counting on you to make a good move so that you can easily be there for all of them. You’ll Be Able to win, and dealing with your restraining order and bogus safety orders need time to work and persistence – perseverance is paramount to winning child custody of the kids.


Jamshaid Chaudhary

I began writing as a professional on my personal blog and then discovered my true calling, which is writing about technology, News and gadgets in general. I am a technical writer, author, and blogger since 2010. An industry watcher that stays on top of the latest features, extremely passionate about juicy tech news and everything related to gadgets. For tech tips, https://www.facebook.com/chandni888